Jan L. Watkins, JD, MSW

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10 Ways You Can Use Tapping to Transform Your Life

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If I could have only one therapy or self-help tool, it would be EFT/Tapping. EFT/Tapping is a simple tool created by Stanford-trained engineer Gary Craig over 20 years ago. You can learn tapping in five minutes. With a little practice and training you can proficiently use EFT to deal with every emotional reaction.   

Emotional Freedom Techniques (“EFT” or “tapping”) is a simple and powerful self-help method based on research showing that trauma contributes greatly to disease. Tapping uses elements of cognitive therapy and exposure therapy and combines them with acupressure, in the form of fingertip tapping on 12 acupuncture points. This technique can be learned in minutes and used to treat a myriad emotional and physical issues.  

Like other seekers, I have attended countless workshops and devoured materials on self-growth, spirituality, energy work, and healing. The one tool I would not be without is tapping.  

There are many ways you can use tapping to transform your life, starting now. Here are just a few: 

1. Know thyself

Edgar Cayce counseled his students to know themselves and take personal responsibility for what happened in their lives. With EFT, we can do exactly that. By learning to understand and manage our emotions, we can take a more empowered perspective approach toward our lives and assume responsibility for ourselves. We can resolve old dysfunctional beliefs, patterns, habits and emotions and change our experiences by changing how we show up in your lives.  

2. Update your subconscious beliefs 

Edgar Cayce said the subconscious mind is a “storehouse of memory patterns” (Thurston, A Search for God, Book 1). He pointed out that most of the memory patterns in the subconscious mind are limiting and self-centered and contain patterns that avoid risk and resist change. Scientist, Bruce Lipton, suggests that the subconscious mind controls 95% of our life. Using EFT, we can follow emotional reactions back to the related limiting beliefs in the subconscious mind. Once the anchoring emotions are released, beliefs generally update automatically to more functional, positive ones. In EFT language, we call this a cognitive shift. These shifts accompany most effective tapping sessions.  

3. Use your experiences as opportunities to grow 

EFT is a great tool for spiritual growth. Cayce counseled that “we are here at this time because our eternal souls have need of certain experiences in the earth plane” and that experiences are not “problems” but “opportunities” for a particular development of a soul’s needs (Source: Cayce materials). By tapping on our difficult experiences, we can use these experiences as opportunities to grow and learn.  

4. Have better relationships 

Edgar Cayce taught that we need to accept other people as they are. This is hard to do when we have emotional reactions to their behaviors. We can tap and remove our reactive energy, thereby getting closer to a neutral response with others. This allows us to have more understanding and compassion. It also leads to more clarity about setting boundaries with others. One of my clients became reunited with her estranged father and his family after tapping through the anger and resentment she had held toward him for many years.  

5. Clear daily emotional reactions, such as anxiety, frustration, and irritation 

We all have emotional reactions. It’s part of being human. We often think of emotions as intrusive and unwanted. However, once we learn how they work and what to do with them, we can see that emotions are useful. By tapping away emotions as they arise, we keep our bodies free from stress and the accompanying elevated cortisol and adrenaline levels. We can keep our minds and hearts clear and we can more easily stay present and grounded. 

6. Grow spiritually and find the master teacher within

We can gain a new understanding of the mind/body connection and how our thoughts and emotions affect our bodies. By clearing emotional reactions and related physical symptoms, we can shift the underlying limiting beliefs. Eliminating drama, pain, and negative thoughts with simple tapping exercises will pave the way to move up the emotional scale toward higher level emotions, like peace, calm, bliss and inspiration. Our spiritual self can expand, and we can connect with the master teacher within. 

7. Achieve meditative states and improve your sleep  

With EFT we can quiet the body and the mind by dealing with disturbances that interfere with achieving deep meditative and relaxed states.  

8. Manage physical situations

According to Edgar Cayce, the physical body holds the entirety of our experience as a soul. We can use tapping to address physical symptoms by identifying and clearing emotional contributors to physical pain.  I have supported clients through difficult health challenges by helping them reduce the fear, stress, panic, and other disruptive energies that their bodies are holding. I have used tapping to help clients through surgeries, childbirth, difficult diagnoses, and other challenging situations. 

9. Deal with whatever life brings your way 

I have helped clients in physical, financial, and emotional distress using the simple tapping approach of tuning in to the emotion and tapping gently on several prescribed points. “Mary,” once sad and childless, is now a mother. “Rose,” once single and desiring a spouse, is now married. “Marty,” once facing life-changing surgery, is fully recovered and has resumed a normal life. EFT can be used to improve any situation that is causing an emotional reaction.  

10. Use tapping to support your affirmation practice

You can simply add tapping to your affirmation practice to calm the body and remove resistance to affirmations. For example, you can tap gently through the tapping points while stating the following affirmations that relate to Edgar Cayce’s A Search for God, Book 1.  

Cooperation: I choose to be a channel of blessings.  

Know Thyself: I choose to know the light inside myself. 

What is my Ideal: I choose to see the highest truth in others? 

Faith: I choose a pure, faithful and open heart. 

Virtue/Understanding: I choose virtue and understanding. 

Fellowship: I choose to remove all barriers to meaningful connections.  

Patience: I choose patience.  

We are witnessing heightened emotional reactions in our environment today. It is the perfect time to incorporate a tool into your life that will help you and your family navigate challenging situations. We are all having our own unique reactions to current events because we all have different backgrounds. Regardless of your personal experiences around politics, the pandemic, and other uncertainties, tapping can help you not only cope, but thrive.   

Learning and reviewing EFT in a group setting is especially powerful. I hope you can join the upcoming EFT Training Workshop. We will meet on January 21, 22 and 23, from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. You will learn everything you need to know about EFT!

EFT for Fear of Possible Future Event

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I received the following question from an EFT practitioner who was working with a student who had a fear of future school shootings.  

One of my teen clients is having intense panic and anxiety thinking that there will be a shooting at his school. I tried the following:

  1. Tapping on what the client reported: “Even though I’m panicked and scared . . . “. This did not lower the intensity at all because her fear is about what could happen.
  2. Future Pacing: The client said that she “freezes in scary situations” so I had her imagine going to school and going through her classes….then hearing frightening noises that triggered the fight/flight/freeze response. 
  3. I had her imagine taking action instead of “freezing” such as hiding in a closet or going out a window to her car in the parking lot where she would feel safe.  She said she felt less anxious afterward and felt like she “had a plan” however; I don’t feel like that was the way to go because I’m thinking she may do something unsafe in a scary situation when it might be better to freeze than take action.

I wonder if I should have tried: “What if everything works out fine and all my worrying isn’t going to change anything” yet that didn’t seem like it would be the way to go either.  I’m not sure why other than my intuition.  

A triggered emotional body doesn’t know the difference between past, present and future. The client is presenting with a fear that is being experienced and felt in the present time. It doesn’t matter that the trigger is her thought about a possibility of something happening or a memory of something that did already happen. Here are my suggestions when tapping for fear about a potential future event.

  • Continuous tapping: When you see that the client is distressed or is about to talk about something that will bring distress, suggest that they begin tapping. Make sure the tapping does not distract or disturb their sharing. For example, simply tapping on the karate chop while talking and tapping is adequate. No set up or SUDS needed.
  • Dissociate if necessary: If you believe that there will be too much distress in describing the fear, suggest that the client use some form of dissociation. For example, invite the client to put the fear in the distance, behind a screen, in a box, etc. and start by tapping on that.
  • Choose a target and tap globally: You can start tapping globally or specifically. Global is best if the stress level is high. You may get more specific later. For example, you might start with: this fear, this stress in the body, this panic, school, school danger.
  • Choose a specific target and tap: You can choose a specific target, if it is not too overwhelming. For example, you can choose a physical symptom (tense stomach) or a word or phrase (“recent school shooting”). If you choose to focus on the physical sensations, the client can be specific by focusing carefully on the body and this also causes a level of mental dissociation from the traumatizing story. Just find a target to start with and tap. Once the SUDS are reduced, you will decide where to go next.
  • Ask the client to report any memories that pop up: Remember, current emotional triggers are rooted in past unintegrated traumas. If a memory pops up from childhood, the client will be unlikely to tell you about it unless you ask. They will assume it is irrelevant. It is not irrelevant. It is possibly the root of this current triggering or it will lead you there eventually.

But isn’t it normal to be afraid of future tragedies?  Yes, it is. We are not taking away a person’s functional flight, flight, freeze response. Gary Craig, EFT founder, used to say, “EFT won’t make you stupid!” We are trying to eliminate unresolved past triggers so the current fight/fight/freeze system is in optimal working order. If the client is so hypersensitive to triggers because of unresolved past traumas, he or she will likely to be less safe in a crisis.   What we are trying to do with tapping is to reduce the impact of past unresolved traumas on the current situation.

For example, if someone has been through 3 school shootings, we will tap on each one. If someone has been through 3 life events that felt similarly traumatic, we will tap on each one of those past events. After we have done that, the current situation can be dealt with more effectively because it is free of the triggers that pull us into the past.  

  • Tune in and tap.
  • Keep it simple.
  • Have the client feel while tapping.
  • Words and questions from the practitioner can be useful if the client is not feeling or is not tuned in, but they can often get in the way.
  • The practitioner should be asking pointed questions and not directing the client in any way, unless necessary to keep them from being too overwhelmed to do the work.  
  • Avoid leading the client to positive statements It is best to process the upset so the client can generate new thinking. Jumping too soon to your positive reframes of the situation will probably not resolve their fears and could well be a distraction.
  • Use the Movie Technique or Tell the Story Technique Use one of these techniques on the imagined future happening.  
  • Use Sneaking Away and Choice Statements

If the work is not finished, you can return to global statements and positive statements that the client constructs to wrap up the session. It is probably not helpful to make suggestions about what to do in the future. A possible choice statement /sneaking away round might look something like this, BUT it needs to be using the client’s words: “Even though I still fear this, my choice is to be free from old and irrational fears so that I can respond instinctively, intuitively and brilliantly in all situations in my life. (tap three rounds – one on the negatives, one on the positive choice statement, then alternate ending with the positive statement).  

Here are a few specific comments and thoughts about the practitioner session above: Tapping on the statement, “Even though I am panicked and scared. . . ” was likely ineffective with this client mentioned above in the fact pattern, because the client was not tuned in to a specific target, but rather was overwhelmed and tuning into all of life’s fears – past, present and future. Global /general tapping can be useful, but for lasting shifts, it is usually necessary to break that down into digestible pieces.   The practitioner worried that having the client imagine how to respond in the future might cause harm since the plan might not be ideal for every possible future situation. I believe discussing that while tapping served to desensitize some of the fears. While it may not cause a lasting shift, I trust that if the practitioner was acting from a calm and present space, her intuition was solid and that doing this was positive. The practitioner mentions that her intuition helped her rule out having the client tap on “What if everything is fine and worrying won’t change. . . ” Usually, if the practitioner is constructing the statements, it will be less powerful than client constructed statements and can even interrupt the client’s process. Asking questions is almost always a good way to stay client- centered.  

A final note to the practitioners- Tap on your distress and worry, before during and after a session. Stay grounded and present in a session. You are unlikely to cause harm unless you take responsibility that isn’t yours or lead the session with your opinions. A client has defense systems in place and will likely use them. Remember, EFT is client-centered. The EFT practitioner is not the expert. Be curious, ask questions, repeat back exact words and keep tapping.

The Magic of Tapping: Stressful situation turns around overnight

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Before I tap with a client, I will often tell them what they can expect to happen after we clear emotional distress. The reason I do this is because, otherwise, they will not believe that tapping influenced the changes. If they fail to see this connection, the magic of tapping will be lost on them and future tapping opportunities will missed. Here’s one example.

My client, “Ben” called in a state of distress asking to tap on the spot. As a lawyer working for a Wall street firm in New York he was so overwhelmed, he didn’t know what to do. Due to time constraints, our emergency session was very focused on reducing emotional charges without discussing details of the situation he was experiencing. This client is an experienced tapper and so we were able to work quickly, dispensing with story telling and SUDS ratings.

I let Ben start to explain the numerous overwhelming aspects of his current condition. Each time he got to an emotionally charged place, I asked him to switch from his mental state of telling the story to a clear and intentional focus on feeling the emotion coming up, paying particular attention to physical feelings.

First, Ben was dismayed because a colleague had turned out to be less of a team player than Ben had hoped, keeping himself in the limelight without attributing certain work to Ben. He explained how he felt confused, angry and betrayed. Ben really wanted to discuss the details and mentally figure out what had happened and whether he had done anything to cause the colleague’s apparent shift. I guided him to simply feel each emotion. When you focus on an emotion and there is no resistance, the emotions clear in moments. Confusion quickly gave way to anger, betrayal and sadness.

Next, Ben switched to his distress about being trapped in an out of balance life, believing that he had few viable options for making a life change. Without discussing the reality of the situation, I simply had him feel the feeling of being trapped, explaining briefly that this was surely not a new feeling, but rather one that has and would repeat, unless the original source of it cleared. We didn’t have time to search for and find root causes, so I again directed him to focus fully on feeling trapped.

Rather than tapping globally on this overwhelming job situation, I kept identifying each aspect as it arose and encouraged him to pause and feel each one while tapping. Each time he advanced to another aspect.

A new aspect arose around Ben’s concern that the supervising partner would judge his performance negatively since this partner was unaware of all the facts. I had Ben imagine the partner standing in front of him in a judgmental stance looking skeptical and disapproving. Ben felt that and continued tapping.

We addressed other minor concerns and there was some conversation interspersed in between our focused tapping.

Finally, we ended. Ben was emotionally more calm. Within 12 hours, the following things happened:

  1. A major event took place that resulted in the entire work flow being delayed 2 months which will alleviate the extreme pressure he’s been working under.
  2. The partner, out of the blue, sent an email to the bossy colleague essentially validating a piece of Ben’s work the colleague had criticized.
  3. The partner uncharacteristically called Ben for a chat. During the call, the partner suggested that Ben needed some time off This gave Ben the opportunity he’d been looking for to mention upcoming vacation plans.

Ben reported these events to me the following day and said, “let’s keep tapping.” I had previously told Ben that relief would come when we tapped on the emotions. I even suggested that one possibility that might happen was a delay in the project. More precisely, as emotions cleared, cognitive shifts happened. As we change our underlying core beliefs, our environment changes to align with these beliefs. Tapping practitioners see this every day and that’s why we love tapping.

Tapping for Winter Blues

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https://youtu.be/FiBAljX6hcw

Tap along with this introductory video to learn EFT, whether or not you have winter blues. You won’t get winter blues by tapping along! If the phrase “winter blues” does not resonate for you, you can jot down an issue you’d like to tap on and tap along talking over me with your own words, or just repeating my words. Either way, you will get results. The EFT Clinical Technique, Borrowing Benefits, is at work.

Note: This is a general /global approach to tapping. This is always useful, but to get deeper and profound cognitive shifts and permanent results, it will probably be necessary to tap on specific events. Look for my upcoming specific issue tapping videos and tap along!

EFT Case Study: Insomnia

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Clients often ask whether EFT will work for a particular issue. EFT will improve
any situation you are dealing with. It is a powerful tool to work through any situation.

You can achieve lasting results by thoroughly exploring the roots of an issue. This short 20-minute session from a recent workshop illustrates the effectiveness of approaching an issue using the EFT clinical techniques that you can learn in the workshops.

* The EFT techniques used are bulleted and indicated parenthetically. 
“Susan,” not her real name, volunteered to work on her insomnia. Susan explained that she regularly woke in the middle of the night. She would take the first thought or concern that came to her mind and imagine how that thought or concern could develop into the worst possible outcome.
  • I had her locate in her body exactly how this felt and asked her to describe the pain vividly (specificity, using physical symptoms to address emotional issues). She immediately felt pressure in her chest. 
  • She described it as a fist-sized, dense, sharp, blue pain. Susan rated the sensation at an 8 out of 10 (SUDS).
  • I asked her if she could recall the first time she felt this feeling and she could not (searching for core events). I then encouraged her to continue feeling the sensation, but to also be aware if any thoughts or memories came to her mind as we began the Set Up statement, “Even though I have this fist-sized, dense, sharp, blue pain in my chest, I accept myself and I’m ok now.” 
  • After a round or two of tapping, she recalled a seemingly random memory of a sporting accident. She reported about the accident, “I didn’t do what I knew how to do.” For the next round we tapped on, “Even though I didn’t do what I knew how to do, I deeply and completely love and accept myself” (exact words). 

After a round or two, I asked if she noticed anything. She recalled a memory of sitting outside her parents’ bedroom door as a very small child while they argued. She remembered feeling powerless and incapable of doing what needed to be done or of impacting the situation positively. The words came to her mind, “I can’t take care of myself.” I asked her to focus in her mind and in her body on the child sitting outside that door and to notice how the child felt. We then did a couple of rounds incorporating those words into the set up. I asked her to use the image of the child to check for progress of emotional changes. Sometimes it is easier for a client to focus on an image of his or her child self and notice the emotional reaction the child is having rather than to identify a current emotional response. I asked her what the child needed to know to be alright. She said, “I can take care of myself.” 

  • We tapped on the child’s emotions until she imagined the child was OK and walked away from the door to her parents’ room (using intuition, client-centered process, specific core events). 

Sometimes it is helpful to have the client verbalize true statements that the child was unaware of such as, “that’s over, you’re ok now, you have more resources, you don’t have to stay there to solve that problem.” You can use your intuition to guide the session. These memories represent the experiences that our early developing brain generalizes for survival purposes. 

  • Our brain will form conclusions, such as, “I can’t take care of myself” (table legs, table tops). Until this limiting learning is updated, the brain will continue to operate under that program. 
  • I then asked Susan to locate the dense sharp pain in her chest. She rated it at a 4. We returned our focus to the physical sensation until it was a zero (testing and aspects). We finished our short demonstration there. 

Susan emailed me later: 

“I woke, as usual, during the night to use the bathroom, which is when the thoughts rush forward the fastest, are the most vivid, and have the strongest emotional impact. It took me a minute to realize that it didn’t happen, but didn’t get too excited about it…yet. When I woke up in the morning, again it took a few seconds to realize that it hadn’t happened! I’ve noticed the same thing ever since! As an experiment, I’ve even tried to start my thoughts going toward some terrible end, but I can’t even really do that – doesn’t happen…at all! It truly is amazing! I am so thrilled and thankful.”
Not all sessions work in this way or this quickly. It is important to be inquisitive and to remember that the client generally has what he or she needs to work through an issue (client-centered process). If you are working on yourself, use these same principles for great results.

Roots of Physical Problems

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My client, “Jenny” came to me to try EFT for her neck pain. We began using EFT Clinical Tools, which included:

  • exploring the beginning of the pain
  • how and when symptoms exist and worsen
  • emotions around the pain
  • ways the symptoms have been incorporated into her lifestyle
  • noticing other ways the physical pain impacted her life

We used the following EFT techniques:

  • psychological reversal
  • gentle techniques
  • talking and tapping
  • releasing negative emotions

We discovered that her neck problems began years ago when she was at a crossroads, specifically when she made a permanent commitment to a relationship with her significant other. Once we turned our work toward the dissatisfaction in that relationship and the regret around that decision, the neck pain reduced.

Her neck pain has become less of an issue in her life and her physical abilities have increased. She feels more confident in her physical strength. We turned our EFT work to her deep dissatisfaction in her relationship, which then led to core emotional work around childhood events with one parent. Today she is stronger physically, emotionally and our sessions are filled with laughter as she discovers more about herself and develops deep compassion for herself and appreciation for her life. She no longer feels stuck. Rather, she is at peace with and she accepts responsibility for her choices.

With EFT “Tapping”, the “energy” or “stuckness” around beliefs, patterns and habits shifts gently, allowing for self-growth. By adding this simple, easy to use tool to your personal and professional work, shifts happen quickly, easily and naturally.